RE: Q&A2 AND a question!

Since high school and even since first year university, I feel the biggest changes that have been made are through my feelings, thoughts and interactions towards other people. Specifically, I have come to realize that not everyone is like me, thinks like me or has the same moral compass as me. This used to frustrate me so much in the past to the point where I would want to throw a pillow at them (I was going to say punch them, but that's just too mean). I couldn't understand how people got mad and held grudges over the stupidest things that weren't even a big deal (Yes, I know I do that too). I think that in the way I learned and experienced this the most is when people didn't understand MY views and didn't respect why I didn't want to do different things. For the life of me, I can't really remember any concrete examples where this was pretty significant, but I do remember girls having problems with me not really wanting to dance with other boys at a club/bar (they had boyfriends too). In other words, I guess I could say that I missed our little "TD bubble". I felt as though I didn't fundamentally click on the same level due to having different religious/moral backgrounds. It definitely made me miss and appreciate you guys that much more and made me realize who my true friends were or who I wanted my close friends to be or at least who I could confide in.

After many talks with people in my "venting" sessions, I slowly began to realize more and more that my frustration wasn't exactly directed at them as a person, but was due to not understanding how in the world some people could be so stupid and think so irrationally. Now when I am in a situation and catch myself thinking how dumb (in my opinion) some people are in the way they react, I simply tell myself that they are not like me and this is what makes the world go round.

Since you guys touched on the faith aspect, I guess I have to do that too. I feel as though my faith has remained the same, although it was challenged many of times. School really kicked my butt the first few years which made me upset and really mad at God. I didn't quite understand why all of my hard work wasn't paying off but funny thing is, as I was thinking about writing this earlier today, I dawned on me to a certain extent why I was having such hard times. I know I'm not strong at the physiology stuff, but instead have a strength in the psychology/directly helping and influencing people. It's as if the pathways were being paved for me or as if I was being molded into a helping-people-person, for lack of better words.

I also came to a point in first year where I visited Redeemer and saw how other people were acting and how they "appeared" so into God and everything. It really made me question things and wonder if I'm even worthy of God. Yes, I believed, but they just seemed so into it and I felt like I would never get to that point. I then heard that people do put on a front, so it made me a little more comfortable so I am back where I was originally. I still feel as though I'm on a God smorgasbord where there are certain things I do (i.e. drink alcohol and yes, occasionally too much... not very often though) and it's hard for me to want to stop (okay... that totally made me sound like an alcoholic but I didn't mean it like that). I know that in a blink of an eye, life can be taken away from me and where would I be then? Do we need to take the Bible so literally? Christianity does boggle my mind with it's complexities and it's blind faith which leads me to question it, but there's always something that makes me hold on to it. Without faith, I am a mess and I need that stability to keep me grounded.

A lesson that I relearned today is that I should never make assumptions before I meet someone. It's not fair to the person and you could be missing out on an opportunity to meet someone great. I have done that a few times and yes, there have been times where my assumptions have been right but today I was reminded that it is easy to be very wrong. There are people in your lives that can add a whole new element and bring you experiences in which enrich your lives. Guys, never let an opportunity of knowing someone pass you by.

One final thing. Gosh, I am a blabber writer. Today I had a guest speaker come in who did some health promotion thing at the White House, sold his company and now is in Ireland, pursuing his bucket list. Something he said stuck with me and it's so simple. Dream big. Don't see problems, but seem them as challenges.

MAYBE this can lead me to a question for you guys. What are some things on your bucket list or at least current dreams you may have?